Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Randomize
