Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
