I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
