It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Randomize