Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
