sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
