does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
This toilet bowl is my home.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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