But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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