apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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