vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
My feet surprised me
Randomize