For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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