Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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