i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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