"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
