I will die if light touches me.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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