If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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