I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
