So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
