i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
