you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
