...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Someone came in the potted fern
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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