i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
