I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
