I seem to have left my pride at pride
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
