I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
