my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I'm bleeding and have questions
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize