You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
