How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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