You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
