Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
