Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
