dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
either way he was missing a nipple.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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