I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize