Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
