Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
