Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
