just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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