No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
