$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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