I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
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