Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
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