She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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