Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
