So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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