I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
