Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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