You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
