Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
