You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Found your dick twin last night
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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