why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I can't turn off my feet"
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
